Malaysian Jokes Series 1

Who says our English is teruk.? Just see below - Ours is simple,short,concise, straight-to-point, effective etc.......
WHEN GIVING A CUSTOMER BAD NEWS Britons: I'm sorry, Sir, but we don't seem to have the sweater you want in your size, but if you give me a moment, I can call the other outlets for you. Malaysians: No Stock. You wan go to other store

RETURNING A CALL Britons: Hello, this is John Smith. Did anyone page for me a few moments ago? Malaysians: Hello, who page?

ASKING SOMEONE TO MAKE WAY . Britons: Excuse me, I'd like to get by. Would you please make way? Malaysians: S-kew me

WHEN SOMEONE OFFERS TO PAY Britons: Hey, put your wallet away, this drink is on me. Malaysians:No-need, lah.

WHEN ASKING FOR PERMISSION Britons: Excuse me, but do you think it would be possible for me to enter through this door? Malaysians: (pointing the door) can ar?

WHEN ENTERTAINING Britons: Please make yourself right at home. Malaysians: Don't be shy, lah!

WHEN DOUBTING SOMEONE Britons: I don't recall you giving me the money. Malaysians: Where got?

WHEN DECLINING AN OFFER Britons: I'd prefer not to do that, if you don't mind. Malaysians: Don't want la...

IN DISAGREEING ON A TOPIC OF DISCUSSION Britons: Err. Tom, I have to stop you there. I understand where you're coming from, but I really have to disagree with what you said about the issue.

Malaysians: You mad, ah?

WHEN ASKING SOMEONE TO LOWER THEIR VOICE. Britons: Excuse me, but could you please ! lower your voice, I'm trying to concentrate over here. Malaysians: Shut up lah!

WHEN ASKING SOMEONE IF HE/SHE KNOWS YOU. Britons: Excuse me, but I noticed you staring at me for some time. Do I know you? Malaysians: See what, see what?

WHEN ASSESSING A TIGHT SITUATION. Britons: We seem to be in a bit of a predicament at the moment. Malaysians: Die-lah!!

WHEN TRYING TO FIND OUT WHAT HAD HAPPENED Britons: Will someone tell me what has just happened? Malaysians: Wat happen Why like that....

WHEN SOME ONE DID SOMETHING WRONG Britons: This isn't the way to do it here let me show you,Malaysians: like that also don't know how to do!!!!

WHEN ONE IS ANGRY Britons: Would you mind not disturbing me Malaysians:Celaka u